Loser

Never think of myself in such a situation like this. Because of a person, I have to move out all a sudden. I have to escape or avoid all the places that I well known, and to hide myself into a situation like this.
My heart is totally broken into pieces, and I need God to glue it back. I felt being left behind and not worthy to be remember. God, I need you to fix this, but before that, thanks for giving a courage to leave this house all a sudden, and find a place where I can live without worries.
I have to admit myself that I am totally lost control. My emotion gone down the hill and have to double up the medication. My physically is not balancing now, and everything turn out to be a crap. Not just moving out from this place, I also cancel all the teachings that I have coming up. Physically, emotionally and spiritually are all in a chaos at the moment, and desperately need God to fix this. Totally surrender myself to The Lord because I am a loser right now.